The Scene I Hear in Retrograde

It is almost 6pm and I have still not completed my 500 words a day.

It’s only day three! It’s not supposed to be this difficult, yet! I’ve come up with several topics to ramble on about all day, but they’ve only resulted in half-finished products. Sometimes I get bored, sometimes it’s just not enough; once it was an idea that I just wanted to remember. My mind is swimming in the top news stories of the day: DOMA and Prop 8 (LGBT community win!), George Zimmerman, Wendy whats-her-face that filibustered for an eternity in Texas, Paula Deen, ugh… my brain is foggy today! I don’t want to talk about news.

Ok. I’ve put on the song I’m hooked on right now that seems to get my creative juices flowing – ‘Retrograde‘ by James Blake. It’s helping a little… Do you have a particular song or album that you’re hooked on right now? Is there something you can normally turn to that will help you become more productive? Music is definitely that thing for me. It has to be the right music, though… and it can be a selection of songs or a 30 second clip from one individual song. Either way, when I’m hooked and I have an idea going it’s like I have to put that little earworm on repeat until the idea has been fleshed out to my satisfaction. I once made a 9-hour drive to my parents’ house while listening to the same 4-minute clip of ‘Point of No Return’, from Phantom of the Opera, over and over and over… I was able to get pretty far into an idea, though!

So now it’s Retrograde. It makes me think of two things that are desperately trying to come together but are caught in some sort of slow-motion chaos. I always imagine the chaos as rotational, as well. Imagine a giant cyclone with a bright object, like the Sun – but not hot, at its center. The two objects are illuminated by this object, they can see one another; but try as they might, the force of the wind keeps them apart. It’s a force that’s bigger, stronger than them and only the right set of circumstances and events will bring them together. And if that happens, if they are brought close enough to one another to grasp hold of each other, the moment is fleeting. They must both reach out, both make the attempt to pull one another in. And if that’s successful, then they’ve got to cling to one another for dear life. They have to wrap themselves around one another to become, to the wind, a singular object. Only their solidarity can carry them through the turmoil of the debris whipping about their heads; and the forces that threaten to tear them apart. As chaotic as this all is, it’s happening in that watery kind of slow-motion that you feel in dreams. You’re running as fast as you can but your legs are in molasses. The urgency is immediate but the progression is frustratingly slow. Except in that fleeting moment… the one where everything can go right or horribly wrong. That moment is faster than light; it’s loud and the full force of the chaos and adrenaline is felt. The noise and chaos never fade, but their attachment to one another returns them to that calm state of dream-like suspension – the slow motion. No longer do they whip, crash and tumble through the debris of the storm – they float; as if in a cushion of air that only they can see. The eye of the storm.

…sounds like an interesting analogy for love; or marriage.

Not bad for having a bit of writer’s block.


1 Comment

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One response to “The Scene I Hear in Retrograde

  1. Pingback: Blogiversary! | Frippits.

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